Monday

So this weekend I got absolutely nothing done school-wise.  I honestly would have liked to, but D was here and it’s difficult to get any work done while he’s visiting unless I really have to or make a strict plan beforehand.  Otherwise, hanging out just sounds like more fun.  But now it’s biting me in the ass, because the beginning of the week is going to be insane as far as school.  Like from now until at least Wednesday.  Today I have a bunch of reading to do, a paper to do, and a couple pages to write for another class.  For Wednesday I have a long lab due.  And then on Tuesday I’m working for three hours (non-consecutive hours, mind you) at this suicide prevention demonstration one of my clubs is doing.  That same club wants to meet basically every night to get ready for the event this weekend.  So I have that and dance practice and normal club meetings and classes.  And I’m trying to be a better business manager so I can actually justify getting credit for it.  My mom wrote me an email saying she was worried how I was “burning the candle at both ends,” and it’s true.  I just can’t keep this up.  I love seeing D but spending whole weekends every two weeks with him really throws off my schedule.  I can’t sleep right, I spend too much money, I don’t do any work.  I’m not blaming him but it is a difficult pattern to keep up for a long period of time.  There are a lot of times I’m glad we don’t attend the same school because then I worry that I would never get anything done and would just hang out with him all the time.  (That is also a fear that enters my mind when we consider living together.)  At the time it’s a lot of fun, but in the longer run it’s damaging to our schoolwork, extracurricular involvement, and friendships.

At least once this week is over I only have 3 more days until I get to go home Wednesday night for fall break.  Won’t it suck to be a real adult and not get a ton of stupid little breaks all the time?  I’m not looking forward to that.  But at least when you’re working (at least in my idea of a job), you’re just doing it from 9-5 and the rest of the time is your own.  When I was interning last semester I was frequently so tired at the end of those long 8 hours that I wasn’t really up for doing much anyway … but at least there’s not always homework/papers/reading/tests hanging over your head.  All the time.

I am just using this time to sort of gather my thoughts before I have to really get to work.  I just feel like even though this weekend was a lot of fun (perhaps I’ll talk about it later), I had basically no time just for myself, and not getting that over the next few days, either, will make it hard for me to stay focused and produce the work I need to do.  Plus I am just so exhausted from not sleeping well at all last night.

Ugh plus I have an application due Wednesday that I just remembered.  Is everyone trying to kill me with all of these responsibilities?

Homecoming weekend should be interesting … I am supposed to be at a suicide prevention walk in the morning, table in the morning, and dance at the game.  My mom is coming in to watch me dance and so we will go out to lunch or dinner.  I haven’t decided whether I’m going to the homecoming dance or not.  I didn’t go last year due to a massive hangover … better not let that happen this year, too much to do!  I think I went my freshman year but the fact that I can’t really remember probably isn’t a very good indicator that it was a lot of fun.

Ok, I’m done rambling.  Time to go at least try to knock off some of these tasks …

Em