… And it’s not even technically over yet.  I don’t miss working.  But I miss having tons of time to just hang out and do whatever, spending time just chilling with D and other friends.  Now it’s back to the world of responsibility, and I don’t really want it.  Maybe it’s just the stupid bureaucracy of school that gets me down.  (Having to do required classes you don’t have any interest in or thought you already completed.  Yeah.)  I’m just sick of being in school and I haven’t started school yet.  But I don’t know what I want to do when I get out, so I’m trapped between a rock and a hard place.  To be honest, I think I just want a life where I can bum around and do nothing all the time.  But then I would be bored.  It’s just so easy when I’m with D because we have a companion whenever we want to do something.  Here, every single meal requires coordinating if I don’t want to possibly eat alone.  It’s just a lot of work.  I want to live right by friends.  But then I also don’t, because I like having somewhere I can go to hang out and be alone sometimes.

The problem with my whole personality is that it’s so damn conflicting.  I like certain things but only in certain situations.  Sometimes I like tons of stimulation, but other times I like being by myself.  I’m the party girl who’s also super-studious.  I’m creative and a good writer, but I’m also good at business and entrepreneurship.  I can do it all, but only to an extent.

Why is everything so confusing? :/

Em